Some are! Some live days,months and even years before they die!! What a stupid headline!!!

Here are more..

Something went wrong in jet crash, experts say ( some expert ! )

Death causes loneliness, feeling of isolation ( probably due to being ALONE in a box )

NJ judge to rule on nude beach ( let's hope he reaches for the right gavel )

Cold wave linked to temperatures ( does Al Gore know about this?)

Miners Refuse to Work After Death ( good help is so hard to find ! )

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant ( that will teach the "darlings" )

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over ( umm isn't that illegal ?)

Farmer bill dies in house ( awwww ! )

Is There A Ring of Debris Around Uranus? ( Please wipe! )

Prostitutes Appeal to Pope ( boy, it's tough being Catholic!)

Sometimes Church Bulletins are vulnerable in making a small typo making the sentence completely different :

The rosebud on the alter this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer. (tsk tsk Rev.)

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 p.m. Please use the back door. ( Well..don't you feel better about yourself?)

 Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance. ( we had them built just for you folks!)

Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons. ( uh-huh! )

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."
The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

 Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered. ( Boy, they must have some large envelopes!)